Let’s Talk About: The Importance of Dating Your Spouse
Date nights improve marriages, according to common sense and a comprehensive, quantitative study conducted by the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia. The study showed improvements for married couples who go on frequent dates across categories such as happiness, commitment, communication, parenthood stability, and community integration. The evidence also showed that married couples who devote time together at least once a week not only have lower divorce rates, but also increase the perceived quality of their marriage. That is enough evidence to start dating your spouse more! In an article about the study , W. Bradford Wilcox and Jeffrey Dew highlight five reasons why date nights have strong correlations to healthy marriages: date nights provide opportunities for communication, novelty, eros , strengthening commitment, and de-stressing. Communication : The importance of good communication is obvious.
When I Stopped Dating My Spouse
Once you are married, never stop dating your husband a wise friend once told me. At first, I giggled a little as I thought she was joking. Dating is over now that we are married, right? I could not have been further from the truth. Flash forward several years into marriage and I was reminded of the wise words my friend had shared. Somehow in the middle of having kids and learning how to be parents, dating had been pushed to the side.
Keep it up! Don’t stop dating just because you went on a couple of dates and your spouse seems to be appeased. Or because you think you’ve done enough to.
Trending in Marriage. In college, I got to know an elderly couple who took a real liking to me, and they would often have me over to their house and take me out to dinner. Every conversation would turn into an angry shouting match, and they could barely relate to one another without harsh words or bitter criticisms. And while the Church has always defended the indissolubility of marriage, it is a tragic reality that Catholics are civilly divorcing at essentially the same rate as everyone else.
The causes of this breakdown of marriage are many, but really, the solution is simple. We who are called to the vocation of marriage must love our wives. Your mission as a Catholic husband is to become a life-long student of your wife. Study to understand her hopes and dreams, her fears and practical concerns. What does she hate? What makes her happy?
53 Great Date Ideas to Keep Your Marriage Fresh
Sounds strange right? Dating is what a couple does when they are interested in each other. Dating is what a couple does when they are learning about each other.
Dating your spouse feeds the fires of romance. Before we got married, my (future) wife and I spent every minute we possibly could together. When we weren’t.
We met Marcy and Jack during our first group dance lesson. Forty years to be exact. The wedding came and went, but Marcy and Jack kept returning for dance lessons week after week. With practice, they continued to hone and improve their dance skills as a couple. And yet, they tapped into something far greater than dance. They began to experience and integrate an idea central to healthy relationships—continual, purposeful dating and practice is not only helpful, but is central to cultivating and maintaining meaningful attunement, connection, and intimacy in romantic relationships.
While healthy marriages require us to put in this intentional effort, and to pursue one another on a continual basis, many dominant paradigms in our culture tell us otherwise. The message is spoon fed to us as children, and reverberated throughout our culture. Marriage is not a destination. Marcy and Jack know this. They know that marriage, like dance, is a continually unfolding journey in which they are active participants, shaping and molding their shared reality.
They know that if they take a few months off from dance, and neglect their practice, it will be apparent in the quality of their dance and interactions. Maintaining regular practice not only helps keep them connected and attuned as they dance, but it also allows them to reach new heights and depths with one another.
Never Stop Dating your Spouse!
TheHookahAffair is an honest blog about real marriage. You can also find them on Facebook , Twitter and Pinterest. Erin and I only dated for three months before marrying. Yep, three months.
Few things are worse than being bored in your marriage. Dating is an essential ingredient to a successful and intimate marriage relationship. These boundaries will prove helpful as you as you develop a dating ritual in your marriage. Use them to protect your dating so that it can last a lifetime for you. Make sure that your dating is safe and fun for both of you, so it will have a much greater chance of becoming a fundamental part of your ongoing intimacy together.
The first boundary for making dating successful is this: You may not that discuss problems and personal issues that you are having with your spouse or children. Remember, dating is supposed to be fun and listening to your spouse whine and complain about you is not fun. You can discuss the issues during the other sex and a half days of the week. If you are self employed, do not discuss your business during your date.
You must protect your date time, protect it from personal problems. The second boundary for a couple dating: You may not discuss money. The third boundary for a couple developing a successful dating ritual is this: Do not use this time to run errands.
7 Reasons Why Dating Your Spouse After Marriage Matters
Remember those butterflies on the first date? That first brush against your hand? First kiss? First everything? Yeah, those are pretty sweet.
Relationship Design , Romance. We all know we need to date our spouses. We all know we should be spending quality time together. We all know we should get away from work, home, and kids and be alone together. But sometimes getting out on that all-important date is hard. With that in mind, here are 3 obvious but very important reasons to serve as a reminder of why dating in marriage is so important.
How to Continue Dating When You Are Married
Dating is important for couples who are exploring the possibility of matrimony, but it is also important for couples already in wedded bliss. Before delving into the importance of why you should date your mate, my husband and I wanted to share a portion of our story to raise the question, is dating simply a prelude to marriage?
Jon: I remember the first date I had with Cherie. I was shocked then quickly recovered and immediately asked her to go on a date to see a movie and grab dinner together.
That is enough evidence to start dating your spouse more! In an article about Our goal is to help marriages stay strong and grow together. If you’d like to read.
Do you remember when you first met the person who would become your husband or wife? Those were exciting times! We worried about everything — from where the date would be and how to dress, to how to impress the other person. We needed to be intelligent, spiritual, witty, interesting, communicative, accommodating and an all around well-balanced and likable person. It was a pretty insecure time! As you began dating one person exclusively, you wondered if this person was “the one” for you.
You wondered how and when you would know. Yet many things about our dating experiences were good. And we want to help you recapture the good aspects of the dating experience — the romance, the surprise, the fun, the undivided attention, the discovery — in your marriage. But things will be a little different this time around!
Dating Your Husband: How To Date Your Husband for a Love That Lasts
But no one ever seems to offer suggestions on where to go or what to do with your loved one. After all, going to the corner bistro every Saturday night can get a little stale. To help you brainstorm for a good time, here are 55 exciting date ideas—including some from our readers—that are perfect for newlyweds and married vets alike. Pick up the ingredients you need to create a fabulous meal at the grocery store and then return home and cook it together. Sip some vino while you cook or whip up a mocktail to make it extra relaxing and sensual.
Throw a slumber party for two; serve dinner in bed and have each other for dessert.
I first saw the title “date your mate” in marriage counselor Nancy Pelt’s book “The Highly Effective Marriage.” Through the many years I have.
Charles Ighele. This was in addition to calling her about three times within the day. A year into his marriage, this same husband complained of being too busy at work to spend time with his family till I drew his attention to the fact that his working hours were still the same as they were before he got married and his wife was the same lady he had to talk to before going to bed every day.
What changed then? When couples are in courtship, there is usually excitement in the air. There is generally an expression of love and devotion, but after the vows, most couples just recline to their roles as husbands and wives; all the romance gets lost. God wants our love lives to grow. He wants us to grow in love. And love has to be constantly expressed. He did not intend it to be a period of brief excitement and brief romantic feelings.
5 Unusual (and Effective) Ways to Keep Dating Your Spouse
Two days before my wedding day, terrorists hijacked airplanes and attacked the United States. It was September 11 th , and my father was on a flight from Washington DC, heading to our wedding destination. Suddenly, a time that should have been exciting and joyful became scary, tragic, and emotionally draining.
One day I woke up and suddenly felt distant from my husband. In between his firefighter and paramedic school demands and the demands of raising our son and taking care of our home, I realized it had been months since we went on a date. We always seemed to make an excuse for not going on dates … money was too tight, we waited too last minute to find a babysitter, or we would rather just stay in. While the distance felt sudden, it took months and months to happen because we were no longer making each other a priority.
When I stopped dating my spouse, things slowly spiraled out of control—our communication, our affection, and our authenticity. While we do spend ample time together going to church, running errands, playing with our son and watching shows late at night, it became apparent that our marriage needed more. Our marriage needed intentional time away from distractions to focus on one another.
While we do not go on dates every week or every other week, we are being more intentional about dating one another and making each other a priority. It does not take a large bank account to make your spouse a priority. If funds are limited, you can go to local parks, explore wildlife, or find creative things to do in your community for little to no money.
If there is anything I like to reminisce on, it is how much fun it was dating my husband before marriage. What we need to remember is that dating improves WITH marriage — your bond strengthens, you continue to get to know your partner. Dating is vital to the continued evolvement of your love story. It is important to continue romancing one another and dreaming together.
12 Reason to Never Stop Dating Your Spouse
The media paints life after marriage as dull, but we married people know better. Want to keep your romance fiery and fresh after the wedding cake has been eaten and the thank-you notes delivered? Here are some great ways to date your spouse! The first step to dating your spouse is commitment.
written by Stephanie Schuster, LMSW, Avalon Psychotherapist. In my work with couples, I often mention the notion of dating your spouse. When first entering a.
I know my wife and I heard this from numerous friends and well-wishers on our path to wedded bliss. The whole relationship up to this point has been nothing but one continuous date spread out over weeks, months, or years. But as those initial moments of wedded bliss turn into years of new jobs, mortgages, dirty diapers, and another round of paying taxes, dating your spouse can get lost in the mix. Why would we need a date night? The truth is, a weekly date night is an absolute must for a healthy marriage.
Do you know how I know this?